508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
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