just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
