We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
there's paper in my vomit.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
