the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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