the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Randomize