Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
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