Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
