take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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