whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
