So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
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