brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
