my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
