I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
