who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
