He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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