There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
