my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
It was a blind-side dick pic.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
