you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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