Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize