his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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