party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Randomize
