I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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