its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I'm just crazy horny about you
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Randomize
