in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
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