The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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