you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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