i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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