But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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