I should be sponsored by Trojan
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Farmville is her only friend.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
