you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
