I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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