It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
