How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Randomize