yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
