I wish I only lived at night.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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