Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
