In the future we'll all be gay
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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