We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
