Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
