take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
