I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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