i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
