I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
