I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
