Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize