found the other keg... it's in the tree
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Randomize