your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
