A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
