never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
