Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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