Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Your topless pictures make me question reality
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
