he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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