He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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